Washington Redskins: Off-Season Champs 2014?

Today at 4:00pm, National Football League teams will be able to sign unrestricted free agents to contracts. Since Daniel Snyder has owned the Washington Redskins, they have tried to dominate the off season with huge signings, hoping to turn things around for the team. Unfortunately, the title "Off- Season Champs" usually earns the Skins very little in the regular season. But hope springs eternal and for Redskins fans like myself today is like Christmas morning.

Good Times! Jim Zorn and Albert Haynesworth, the future looks bright!

What will we find under the tree?

Unlike most sports people, I don't waste my time looking at what the Redskins need. No sir, General Manager Steve0 looks at wants. And what we want are big names. If they have a high rating in Madden, I would sign them up. If they've made the pro bowl, we sign them. So below are some of my concrete theories on this year's crop of Redskins free agents. Enjoy!

Champ Bailey, Cornerback: The Redskins drafted him in 1999, he has a brother named Boss, he's old, SIGN HIM!

Carlos Rodgers, Cornerback: The Redskins drafted him in 2005, he can't catch, we shouldn't have ever let him go, SIGN HIM!

Darrelle Revis, Cornerback: He used to live on Revis Island, now it's more like Revis Peninsula, had a 97 rating in Madden 25, SIGN HIM!

Jared Allen, Defensive End: He's old, he was in Jackass 3-D, he has a mullet, SIGN HIM!

Darren McFadden, Running Back: He's brittle, but fast, a big disappointment so far, SIGN HIM!

The saddest part of this year's free agency period is when we have to say goodbye to some of our favorites as they move on to greener pastures and/or obscurity. So today we remember:

Rex Grossman, QB: Stability in rough seas, I hope you find a starting job where you can throw four interceptions for every three touchdowns.

Sav Rocca, Punter: Your reputation as an Australian Rules veteran earned you much respect. Your punts that went fifteen yards earned you much hate. Happy trails.

If I can be serious ladies and gentlemen, the Redskins have actually shown a lot of restraint recently, so maybe they won't go crazy, but we still remember fondly the days of collecting old veterans as if it were a fantasy football team.